“The Victim No Longer”

“Life can be hazardous to your health” ….. no one gets out of this life, alive ….. and no one gets a free ride”.  Hmmmmm, I don’t know who came up with these phrases, but there is some truth in them.  Every day you hear of someone getting a surprise punch in the nose. Maybe it’s an unexpected diagnosis of cancer, a lost job, a son or daughter lost in the line of duty as a cop or soldier .…. drug addiction, suicide, etc. Life is not easy.

I was 9 years old in 1956 when we got the call that my dad had died of a massive heart attack; it was a shock, it was unexpected. Our life took a 180 degree turn… from a peaceful life as a doctor’s son, nice house, no money worries, respected in the community to a relative nobody in a 3^rd floor apartment with money worries, and the added turmoil of alcoholism taking a toll on my mother and the rest of us. 

What didn’t happen a lot in the mid ‘50’s was a ton of sympathy. Everyone was sorry, but life was tough for all. WWII had ended a few years earlier and many had experienced the loss of a loved one, perhaps a  returning soldier with lifelong injuries, including undiagnosed PTSD. Life was tough for everyone. Being the “victim” didn’t play very well in Peoria in those days. It didn’t mean that people didn’t suffer, it just meant that everyone was pretty much in the same boat…. some better off and some worse off…. no body talked much about it. 

Today you hear a lot about being a “victim”. A victim is “someone  that has been hurt, damaged, killed or has suffered, either because of the actions of someone or something else, or because of illness or chance.” There is a reality to this. In truth probably everyone has been a victim of some kind of hurt and it can affect us. The question that every victim needs to ask is “now what … where do I go from here”. 

We all need healing of things from our past… no one has the perfect life…. yet some definitely have more trauma than others. Left to ourselves, we can develop a “victim mentality ..…..  ” feeling as though we have no control over things, bad things keep happening to me no matter what I do… we can find ourself blaming other people for events or situations in our past….. life just happens to me and I have no responsibility for what happens in my life….”. 

The problem with allowing the victim mentality to rule my life is that it can become a self perpetuating prophecy….. ”my life stinks because of what happened to me, and it’s going to continue to stink, and it’s that person’s fault…. and too often that ends up being what happens…. a self perpetuating prophecy. It’s not pretty. So, what to do?

Well, this is not some “Lucy Van Pelt Psychological Help 5 cents” kind of BLOG. The answer goes beyond Dr. BLOG. But I do know that in Christ we can be healed. In Christ we can forgive those who may have contributed to my “harm” in the past. In Christ our future does not have to depend on our past. We still have time to do great things for the Lord. Jesus will help us. He understands our hurts from the past. He will help us. I can attest to that truth. I have been healed of much from my past, and because of that I’m not bound by my past. There’s always more healing that’s needed, but it will probably have to wait until I see the Lord face to face one day. That’s okay.

Most of us have some level of victim mentality and it’s not good for us. So, let’s ask the Lord to help us, to heal us. He will, because he loves us. And that is very Good News.