“Second Conversion”

Have you ever asked yourself what’s missing in your spiritual life? “Gee, it seems that at this stage of my life in Christ, I should be in a lot better shape.” I read about the saints and think, “woe, I’m just not there.” Is something missing? Hmmmmmmm.

We recently honored the North American Martyrs. Their love for the Lord was incredible. These missionaries left France and lived among the Huron Indians in upstate New York. They suffered incredible tortures and ultimately gave their lives to bring the love of Christ to the Indians. In one story about Fr. Isaac Jogues, it tells of his trip back to France after serving for some time in the missions. He had already been tortured and his fingers mutilated to the point where he was unable to say mass; he is hardly recognizable. 

“Fr. Jogues reached France just in time for Christmas (1646) and attended his first Mass since his captivity. Because of the state of his hands, he could not say Mass himself, but he was delighted to hear it and receive the Eucharist. He then traveled 200 miles to the nearest Jesuit college. Upon arrival, Jogues told the doorman that he had news about the Canadian missions and asked if he could see the rector. At the time, Catholics in France were enamored with the Canadian missions, and the rector rushed toward the visitor. The rector immediately asked Jogues, “Do you know Fr. Jogues?” He responded: “I know him very well.” The rector then replied, “Is he dead? Have they murdered him?” To which the living martyr replied, “No, he is alive and at liberty…and it is he who speaks to you!” Fr. Jogues returned to the missions and was eventually martyred for his faith. 

Have you heard of the “second conversion”? I recently read that a Jesuit priest, Fr. Louis Lallemant (a teacher of Fr. Jogues), was one of the first to describe it back in the 1600’s. His view was “that a man must come to a point in life, sometime after a commitment to God is already firmly in place, in which he realizes that he has not yet fully offered his life to God. Despite what may be years of faithfulness in a vocation, a deeper offering still awaits the soul. A life may be committed and devout and externally dutiful, but it still awaits a deeper realization of an entire offering of itself as an utterly personal act before God. A man has to arrive at a decisive reckoning in which he sees now with fresh eyes what it means to give himself unreservedly to God. Until that time, a life still lacks one thing, as Jesus says to the rich young man in Saint Matthew’s Gospel. A man has not surrendered himself as yet in a complete offering to God.” (ref. Magnificat Oct. 19, 2023, Fr. Donald Haggerty)

You could point to Pentecost and the Baptism of the Holy Spirit as a  second conversion for the apostles, but they seemed to experience continued conversion even after that.  Ever hear of the story of St. Peter sneaking out of Rome during Nero’s persecution of the Christians. ” Legend has it that as St. Peter fled Rome to escape persecution, he encountered Jesus along the way, bearing the cross. Peter asked Jesus “quo vadis, domine?” or “Where are you going?” When Jesus answered, “To be crucified again”, Peter understood that he must return to Rome to follow the footsteps of his Savior.” Peter did ultimately die as a martyr for Christ.

Many are familiar with the first conversion story of St. Augustine; however, not so much with his second conversion. “In St. Augustine’s second conversion, he becomes aware of his own weakness, frailty and need of God’s ongoing grace and healing. Even after leaving his worldly pleasures and becoming a priest and bishop, St. Augustine realizes that he still struggles in many areas. He still found himself lured by the passions of the world, and struggled with sins such as lust, gluttony, comfort, pride, and vanity. When St. Augustine returns to Carthage in North Africa and preaches to the people there, he said: “Whoever thinks he can do it on his own, doesn’t understand himself or Him whom he seeks.”

There is so much more to say about “second conversions”, but this BLOG is getting way too long and discombobulated. So the bottom line is we need to continually encounter Christ and be converted more deeply. We need to fall more deeply in love with the Lord every day. And who knows where the Lord may eventually lead us. But I do know this, ….. he will always prepare us for wherever he leads us. And that is very good news. “Hey Dave, Quo Vadis”….yikes, who said that?